We lie down for a chat with the hero of the hotel spa, the savior of the sanitarium: the model in the hot stone massage photo.
There’s no shortage of transcendent hotel spas (like these), but when it comes to spa photography, as an art form, it can be a struggle to capture the euphoria one feels during a treatment. How can a mere snapshot portray the sense of healthy, glowing rejuvenation? It can’t, really.
That is, except for one image, maybe: the lady lying down for a hot stone massage.
Thank god for this image, and thank god for the singular woman who appears in every one of these photos.
We caught up with her for a Tablet interview exclusive.
Thanks for speaking with us. You’re a legend in the industry. Do you want to sit up?
No, thanks.
Okay. So what’s the key to the perfect hot stone massage photo?
Three words: Beauty. Serenity. Ecstasy. Three more words: Smooth. Black. Stones. And then another three words: On my back. If you enjoy repetition, I know you’ll enjoy my work. I am in every single spa photo gallery ever.
You really are. What are the challenges of the job?
You’d think after all these years of lying on a massage table with hot stones on my back, I’d be this completely relaxed, zen’d out person. Not at all. The stones are really hot.
But you make it look so easy.
There’s only two choices to make. Lie there with my eyes closed, or lie there with a thousand-yard-stare I call “the Manson.” I usually just close them.
Are you interested in any other types of spa modeling?
Of course. Not actively, but just as a fan of the art form.
Such as?
Oh you know, I’m a big admirer of classics like “light face touching.” Another one I’ve seen lately is “towel mummy.” And of course you have to give credit to the pioneers, shots like “just a bunch of towels in a sauna.”
How did you get into hot stone massage modeling?
I was discovered during a hot stone massage. I started to drift off in the pure euphoria of the experience and when I woke up six hours later — completely rejuvenated, by the way — I found myself gazing into the eyes of a hotel spa photographer.
She told me she had a contract with 9,000 hotel spas around the world and she didn’t have time to think of unique shots for them all. She asked if I’d be willing to lie down with stones on my back in every location, occasionally dying my hair for variety.
It’s been very lucrative.
What do you think of the photos?
Oh, they’re boring.
I wouldn’t say that.
No, they are.
Then why do you think they’re so successful?
Lots of massage is this really intense, good pain. Acupuncture. Deep tissue. It’s obviously satisfying when you’re getting it, but you know what doesn’t photograph well? Grunts and porcine grimacing.
The hot stone is one of the only massages that actually looks relaxing. Plus, they only have to pay for me and Hands.
Hands?
Oh, sorry. The disembodied hands placing the stones on my back in a lot of the photos. That’s my friend Hans, we call him Hands. It’s the perfect modeling job for him. From the neck up, he’s terribly disfigured.
I’m sorry to hear that. Is there anything else you want your fans to know?
A lot of influencers and so-called content creators are coming for my crown. Just remember one thing. As relaxed as I look, I don’t do this because I want to, I do it because I’m the GOAT.
The Michael Jordan of massage photos. Thanks so much for speaking with us.
COMING UP: Tune in next week as we’re joined for another interview exclusive, this time with the model who overlooks the ledge of every hotel infinity pool.
